Artist Yayoi Kusama; National Art Center, Tokyo, March 2017

Today I woke up to yet another report of Trump tweeting badly: he had posted a mock video of himself tackling and beating a man with a CNN logo superimposed on his head.

https://www.nytimes.com/2017/07/02/business/media/trump-wrestling-video-cnn-twitter.html

Although his Homeland Security Deputy apparently thinks otherwise, Trump’s message is unambiguous: he intends to bring down people or institutions that criticize him–violently if necessary.

While it is tempting to believe that Trump’s behavior is isolated and specific to him alone, unfortunately, it is not. As leaders we have to monitor ourselves continually, so that we don’t act like Trump, even a little bit.

With regard to today’s tweet storm, here’s what’s wrong:

-Unless they are wrestlers or boxers by profession, good leaders do not punch, threaten to punch, or “joke” about punching people. Mature leaders eschew violence or the threat of violence. Period.

-Words and tone also “pack a punch.” Shaming, lying about, or castigating people publicly is violent. Trump has his own brand of this, but those of us who are not presidents also need to clip our sarcasm, avoid using inflammatory words, and never make personal criticisms in public. (While it is a leader’s responsibility to critique proposals, policies and processes, this must be kept distinct from maligning people’s fundamental worthiness. There is no place for white supremacy, sexism, homophobia, and all the other “-isms” in a strong, mature leader.)

-Good leaders never display intent to harm, even if they are feeling enraged. Self management is everything; as soon as a leader displays a juvenile inability to control his or her baser impulses, s/he loses people’s trust. Leaders simply do not have the luxury of acting out. EVER.

-Strong leaders respect other human beings at baseline. They model strength, self-discipline, intelligence, and humility. In other words, they BE someone that someone else would want to follow. To tweet a Batman-like video (“Pow!” “Oof!”) is not only coarse and disrespectful, but it murders the chance that Trump will himself be respected or taken seriously by strong leaders elsewhere.

-Trump’s tweets have two kinds of readers: those who cheeringly concur and those who furiously resist. The ones who concur may well be emboldened to act out in the ways that he does, ultimately rending the fabric of society. Those who resist may well be frustrated or despairing, seeing no viable avenues for participating in society. Both of these are harmful for our country.

The same is true in any organization lead by someone whose behavior is gleefully inflammatory, or polarizing. A leader’s role is to create meaningful dialogue among all factions of her or his organization, by exhibiting curiosity, respect, and imagination for tackling polarizing problems together.

-By definition, every leader is the chief representative of the team, organization, or nation which s/he spearheads. It is inevitable then that the behavior of the leader impacts the reputation of his/her group. Last week, a global poll showed that US standing had plummeted in the wake of the Trump presidency. https://www.washingtonpost.com/world/poll-shows-us-tumbling-in-worlds-regard-under-trump/2017/06/26/87a4f1bc-5857-11e7-840b-512026319da7_story.html?utm_term=.42f8cd444296. This is also true for leaders of companies or teams; if the leader behaves badly, the enterprise gets slimed.

If you hope to be a strong leader, remember that you are always “on.” The stakes are higher for you–and the scrutiny is more intense–precisely because of your standing.